How the Kitchen Raised Me
I ain’t grow up with no apron lessons from my mama. She was doin’ her best—balancin’ bills, us, life and burnout.
But over in Weyanoke, my godmother had a whole different sermon. I went there on the weekends, during school breaks and over the summer. She’d say, “I’m gon’ show you how to be a man who don’t need no woman to cook or clean for him.” And she meant that.
She taught me how to sweep (using carpet), fold sheets and towels, take out the trash, clean a dish, cook and scrub a tub like it owed me rent. Her kitchen was a classroom—no whiteboard, just pots, pans, and pride.
That was my intro. But the real bootcamp came when I clocked in at my first job.
Restaurant work’ll teach you fast. Ain’t no “I’ll do it later.” You learn the difference between clean and sanitized.
You learn about rotating product—FIFO, baby: first in, first out. You learn that food safety ain’t just a rule, it’s a lifestyle.
Gloves, hairnets, temp checks, cross-contamination—real talk, I could teach a ServSafe class off memory. Wish I would’ve taken the class and got that certification (would be in handy now).
And the cookin’?
Learned how to dice an onion without cryin’ (most days)—shoutout to the manager at Kolache.
Learned the difference between a rough chop and a fine mince.
Learned that seasoning ain’t just salt—it’s onion powder, paprika, garlic powder, cayenne, soul. Learned how to eyeball an egg and know when it’s ready, how to flip a burger without losin’ the juice, how to keep a station tight even when the rush hit.
I know how to use a slicer. I know how to break down a box of produce and rotate it right. I know how to clean a grill, degrease a fryer, and mop a floor so clean it squeak when you walk on it.
And now? I use that every day. My home stay clean when I do it lol. My meals hit when I do cook—even if it was an experiment. I cook with intention, clean with pride, and organize like I’m runnin’ a shift—even when it’s just me.
But when I have a family? Oh, it’s gon’ be different.
My kids gon’ know what a cutting board is. They gon’ learn how to clean a bathroom and cook a meal before they learn algebra. I’m gon’ pass down everything my godmother taught me, everything the job showed me, and everything I learned in trial and error.
So yeah—shoutout to my godmother for plantin’ the seed.
Shoutout to every restaurant that halfway raised me. Sometimes, the kitchen teaches you more than school ever could.
Growing up without formal cooking lessons at home, many find that real-life kitchens and the experiences in them become their true classrooms. The narrative of learning from a godmother who emphasized self-sufficiency highlights an important life skill: the ability to maintain a clean space and prepare meals independently is crucial for personal growth and confidence. Working in restaurants is especially transformative. The discipline required to follow food safety protocols like FIFO (first in, first out), proper sanitation, and avoidance of cross-contamination builds a deep respect for health and hygiene standards. Wearing gloves, managing temperature controls, and maintaining hairnets are not just rules but part of a lifestyle that keeps customers safe and kitchens efficient. Moreover, restaurant work teaches valuable culinary techniques such as dicing onions without tears, differentiating between rough chops and fine mincing, and the art of seasoning with a blend of spices beyond just salt. Practical skills like using a slicer, breaking down produce, and rigorous cleaning methods including degreasing fryers and scrubbing grills are often overlooked in traditional education but are essential for quality culinary work. This hands-on experience also nurtures time management and organization skills—running a kitchen station during peak hours requires quick thinking, multitasking, and maintaining order under pressure. These abilities translate well into daily life, from keeping a home clean to cooking intentional and enjoyable meals. Passing down these skills ensures future generations value self-reliance and hygiene. Teaching children how to use a cutting board, clean bathrooms, and cook meals before focusing solely on academics encourages practical life readiness. This kind of upbringing fosters independence, responsibility, and pride in one’s capabilities. In sum, kitchens and restaurant jobs serve as schools of life, imparting lessons far beyond culinary arts—valuing hard work, discipline, pride, and community. For many, including the author, these experiences form the foundation of adult life, showing that sometimes, the kitchen teaches more than conventional classrooms ever can.
