A cycle of dominance and control

Did you know there is such a thing as the narcissistic abuse cycle?**

It’s a predictable, manipulative pattern that every victim of a narcissist eventually comes to recognize — though often too late. This cycle is not love; it’s control disguised as affection. It follows a painful loop that keeps you emotionally hooked, confused, and constantly doubting yourself.

It starts with **love bombing** — the stage where the narcissist showers you with attention, compliments, promises, and affection. They mirror your interests, make you feel like you’ve found your soulmate, and convince you that what you have is rare and special. You feel seen, valued, and loved — but it’s all an illusion built to trap you.

Next comes **devaluation** — the stage where everything changes without warning. Suddenly, the person who once adored you criticizes, ignores, and belittles you. They withdraw affection, twist your words, and make you question your worth. You start to chase their approval, desperate to return to the love you thought was real.

Then comes **discard** — they leave you, often coldly, and without remorse. Sometimes they move on to a new target immediately, leaving you shattered and confused. But the cycle doesn’t end there.

Finally, there’s the **hoovering phase** — when they come back, pretending to miss you, to test if they still have control. They’ll say they’ve changed, that you’re “the one,” only to drag you back into the same torment again.

The narcissistic abuse cycle isn’t love — it’s psychological warfare. Recognizing it is the first step to breaking free, healing, and reclaiming your power.